Friday, November 30

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Once again Eddie has been proved to us all that he is a strange one... *luv ya babe*!!!

So today i made out like a bandit! I got in touch with another old friend and we talked for hours!!!! The I got a job... *well i get to talk on the ohine so I don't really consider it work* but hey whatever, and I did absolutly nothing! So all in all I had a good day... Actually i had a GREAT day! There is so much to say and so little awake time... i got offline to go to bed but couldn't! It's guilt... I feel like I have to stay up and wait for josh but i really don't... all he'll do is ask how my night was and plop in front of the tv... but he does work hard and at least he asks how my day was... I can't remember my dad ever asking my mom that. I mean come on guys! Just because we have no life doesn't mean we don't have stuff to tell you... Look at me. I have like a million webpages and like 4 friends i talk to. That *Brent* is patheTtic! LOL

So me and Eddie *my new old friend* talked for like ever... I said this before but I love being able to just talk to someone I haven't heard from in years and its like nothing was lost! Anyways... The baby had a BAD day! He wouldn't nap and then he did at like 6-7 then he ate and went back to bed at 8 so when he wakes up at 4am i am making josh get up with him. lol I am babbling again... i hate it when i babble so i'll go now.. KISSES TO ALL
~M~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

11:28 PM
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WE SET A DATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

April 20, 2002! and no smartass remarks to all of the people that know what 420 is... Annie was more excited than I was latnight. lol I am still in disbeliefe! DOn't get me wrong I am soooooooo thrilled but it has been such a long engagement that I think I am more relieved to know it is actually gonna happen

Annie? Is Brent related to Mark??? Cuz I think he looks like him... I haven't seen Mark since I went out with him *5 years ago* but ya know I think he looks like him.

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

2:55 PM
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Tuesday, November 27

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SOme of us are going to spend the rest of our lives trying to figure out what it all means. Some will go trying to fingure out what we are suposed to do, be, or look like. Some people are so comfortable just trying to please others, that they don't have the time to please themselves...

I have been all of the above... I wanted everyone to love me and respect me and think I was smart or beautiful. I spent years of my life wonder what God wanted me to do. The answer came to me one day when I woke up and didn't care anymore... I had friends and family that would love me no matter what I was, did, or looked like. I knew that. Armed with love and friendship, I set out to concour...

I saw that even though I am not as religous as I used to be and as much as my friends are... That I will live for today and God will lead me in this journey we call life. I know that he wouldn't put me through something unless he KNEW that I would overcome. I have been through some really *and we're talkin' REALLY* bad things in my short 20 yrs alive. But now I just look back and see that those hard times have made me stronger... and they taught me something.

I learned that people that say they love you will love you no matter what you do say or how you act. I remember one summer... I was upset over a breakup and decided to cut my hair up to my chin. I called a few friends *freaking out about my hair and yellin how ugly I now was and how my hair now made me look stupid* and both of them said the exact same thing *If you shaved your head bald, I would love you the same*... That summer I found love in people other than family, I found out that I could love someone and tell them that I loved them if they weren't family or a guy I was nuts about. Since then I have had the same few friends in my life.....

I don't try and please everyone anymore... If I meet someoe and we talk and then they still like me after they see who I am... thats great, they then know what good friend I can be and that I am honest and caring to those who love me. I am so in love!!! I love life and I really don't want to leave anytime soon, and that my friends is how we should all feel.

I get so frustrated when I hear about people not know how to be happy... You don't need anything other than love, love for life, love for a higher power, love for those around you. You need not to please everyone in the world. Please God... Please Him by living life to the fullest. No one will ever figure out what He has planned for us, when we pass to heavan we will know, but until then there really is no way. The only advise I can give is to just be happy, as long as His children are happy, He will be happy... and that my friends is love, life and the persuit of happiness.
~Melissa Willey~

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

10:25 PM
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Why is it that whenever I call TECO to see how much my power bill is they tell me on the list for disconnect that day???!!! I just had to go pay them $$$ I don't have or else I would be living in an omish paradise!!! Oh well... Well my pain is not half as bad as yesterday but I do feel like I got the crap beat out of me. And to top that off aunt flow is on her way... I give her till tomorrow morning... EEEEWWWWWW Gross I know right? I am just so tired today! I feel like I haven't slept in years! I wish the pain wasn't so bad because that is exactly what causes the fatige... Myt body goes nuts trying to fight the pain, little does my body know that *we no longer have those resorces at our full advantage* Anyways... I read Annie's blog today.... That girl is so intense! She just lays it all out n the line for ya to listen to what she is truly feeling. I so admire her talents. I am also happy that she has found her *prince charming* even though some people choose not to believe her. i for one am a believer and so happy for them. I haven't me6t him but I feel like I have and I bet they look so cute together. But for now I must leave you with that small amount of babble, for I am starved and beat. food and nappy nap callin my name.
Love you all mucho mucho
~melissa~

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

2:29 PM
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Monday, November 26

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I can't imagine anyone ever being in this much pain!!!!!!!!!! I would never wish pain apon anyone in my whole life........... if you haven't noticed I am having a REALLY bad *pain day*... I feel like *from the waist down* my right side has been severed! Gross I know, but hey you read this so you should know I get graphic. It hurts so bad!!!!!!! I am not fibbin when I say it doesn't hrt anywhere near as bad as trying to give birth to a HUMUNGUS baby that didn't fit might I add and now I know that I don't have the frame to birth a full term baby. Why didn't my doctor try to figure that out before Branden got stuck and all the other bad stuff. If you are dored you can look up *shoulder dystocia* that's what happened and it is so not a good thing. I am rambling and babbling and blah blah blah..... I know but I don't care. I am so trying to preoccupy myself so i don't feel the pain. OMG I T HURTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Does anyone know what happened to reblogger? cuz I think it died, Annie got a new one. Oh well i must go and put my brace back on my back, it has a velcro ice pack on it so you get the best of both worlds! yipee
~Melissa

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

8:20 PM
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Well then... I am so not awake yet! So you can Go See My Page

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

11:34 AM
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Sunday, November 25

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ya know its bad when the only other person *besides* me and mom signs my guestbook... oh well... Today was a relativly good day no major complaints on my end... Love yas
~melissa

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

10:10 PM
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Saturday, November 24

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EEEEWWWWWWWWWW

I just had a 10 minute fight with a freakin palmetto bug. I saw something out of the coner of my eye and low and behold it was him... He was nasty and didn't like my shoes or Codi. So I hunter down the flying insect killer and eventually doused it, but it just slowed him down *remember he does fly* so I squashed him and threw him out! GROSE DUDE! I hate Florida!

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

11:10 PM
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Man oh man! I have not felt good for like 2 days now! My tummy is all like *owwwww* and I ahve this constant empty feeling in it and to top it off all I want to do is sleep! I got up at 8 this morning, got the baby and josh up and past out on the couch until like 12... I don't know... maybe I needed it. I probably did! Mom's friend went back to NY today. Josh's mom's cusin died a few says ago so she had to go to PA for a few days, sooooo Mr C has the house to himself. GO MR C! Oh well... Gonna go to sleep or watch what is on tv... or should I say what isn't on tv

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

8:58 PM
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I just recently gathered some strange information... Josh told me he is going to Los Oles to open another Big City. He claims that he has told me already. He will be down in Ft. Lauderdale for like a month or two. Believe me this is not that bad... I am kinda happy... You see, ever since Josh and I first hooked up, we have spent time apart every year for a month or two. It has never been planned until this past summer and now that he's going back to the south. So in a sence I am used to it and really don't give a crap until he has been gone for like two weeks and then I start to go nuts... But this time its a little different. I get to stay in MY apartment by my self with my puppiesa and the baby! I like that idea. all the othetr times I had to go stay with my mom, but now she is right across the street and its no biggie. If I get scared she'll stay with me and she's a good mommy. I'm sure when the time comes for hjim to go I'll be a little uneasy but until then I am so fine with it... I just thought I would share that with everyone.... LUV YA'S

~Melissa~

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

2:49 PM
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Friday, November 23

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Ok... I am a little more relaxed. I think i will take a shower and finish the daily *routine* because at the same time that that right there will drive me insane... for the time being it will , however, keep me sane. WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED TO REBLOGGER??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

3:11 PM
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* I AM VERY UPET... THIS IS NOT DIRECTED AT ANYONE IN PARTICULAR AND IF YOU READ ALL OF THIS THEN I LOVE YOU TONZ*


I am now so freaking bored I have cried! This is sick!!!! I have no friends... I have no life... I have no way to go to the mall and I have no money to spend.... I sit here and stare at the saqme walls over and over every day... I do the same routine each week. I am so sick of routine! I am so frustrated that God only knows how many typoes there will be in this entry, because I am sick of fixing my mistakes! I am not sorry if I am scaring you and I am not sorry if this is disturbing bercause it's not your problem and if you are reading this that isn't my problem. I am writing for me because I am upset and I need to vent. just picture this in a very loud yelling frustrated on the brink of tears voice and you will somewhat understand the true intensity of my feelings.!!!!

I am so sick and tired of hearing the same shit day in and day out! I hate being ignored and I hate it when you pretend to understand what I am trying to say! And ya know what really bugs me??!! When people just leave me here without asking me if I'll be okay, or if I need anything! I am sick not just today but everyday and I am expected to be here for everyone at anytime, I am expected to be able to do everything without help!

I don't think before I do things because I don't have time to do so. However I do try and think before I speak, because that is something you can't go renig on. I know the 10 second rule and I pften use it or else I would be a lot worse off.

I always come off as a nice person and I get along with damn near everyone and their cusin but sometime I have to be this way or else I won't be so nice the next time. I lewarned you can't let things build up onside... you have to vent and this goes for eveyone! Have you ever met someone that was just flat out mean???? I have and I seriously think its cuz they don't communicate their feelings when they really need to and so do I ... like today I am just flat out in a bad mood.!!!!!!!!

I love my family but there is much confusion here. Josh wants to move because he hates Tampa and I on the other hand have never been happier! I have lived away from my mom since I was 12 and it SUX BIG TIME!!!!!!!! Now she is right across the street and I love it... I can call her whenever and she can come over whenever! If we move... I'll only talk to her 3 times a week if I'm lucky and I 'll never see hjer anymore. I am so upset and confused *desufnoc* as Eddie Hollenbeck would say. well he used to. anywho I really have to go. I am going to write later when I am calm and tell you what is goin on.
~Melissa~

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

2:52 PM
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Thanksgiving almost sucked! I went to Josh's place of work. It was closed to costumers but they had a thing for employees and their families. I feel bad for Annie:( She has enough problems. We all have to be strong take me for example... I have to take 2 shots a day *or i die* I can't throw up *or I can die* I have cronic fatige, asthma, I almost die because I had a baby, I have tachicardia * fast heartbeat* and my eyes are ..... well my eyes! So, with that you learn to have a psitive outlook and get through almost anything. I love you guys!!!!!

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

12:14 AM
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Wednesday, November 21

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I lost another... my bad...

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

11:49 AM
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Tuesday, November 20

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Wow, yeah, so I can't take myself away from my new web page... haha... I just think it's so cool! I made a web page!!!!!!!!!

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

10:55 PM
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DAMN IT!!!!!! I lost another freaking blog!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thats 2 in 2 weeks. anyways go to
http://www.geocities.com/melissawilley/home.html

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

8:00 PM
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I am talking to my grandma and she sure can talk!!!!!!!!!! I have heard the same story 11teen times already.!!! Okay..... Now mom is on the phone! AHHHHh WHAT HAS MY WORLD COME DOWN TO?!?!?!?!!? Annie, if you read this I am praying for Mona. I also need your help with some complicated internet blogger crapola that has fried my brain in the midst of attempted comprehention.

I am so proud of my web page everyone MUST go see it. i put it in a blog earlier. love ya'll
~M~

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

7:57 PM
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Sunday, November 18

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Dudes! The *Unsovled Mysteries* guy is the narator for one of Branden's cartoons!!!! AND!!! Nancy from Roseann is on it too!!! The cartoon is HURCULES!!!! Thats messed up

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

1:06 PM
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Hello to all the people who read this load of useless info.

Mom's internet b/f is in town... needless to say I haven't seen her in two days. She has this thing about letting me meet her men..thing is I'm not allowed. She thinks I'll scare them off! LOL I can't help the fact I am a goof and whatever else she can think of. My theory is that if they think I am strange or if I scare them off then they weren't good enough in the first place. I have only scared one off and mom went off on him because he said that our relationship was weird. Well I'm sorry if I worry about my mommy! Come on dude. One of her boyfriends and I became friends and I still talk to him. Personally I wanted her to be with him but I can understand why she doesn't want to.

On a lighter note... Well, not really. Listen to what happened to me yesterday! I was taking a little nap and the phone rang, I let the machine get the first one and the 5 minutes later it rang again! So I answered it. It was Brenda! I talked to her for like 5 minutes and then checked the machine... It was Grandma! She sounded scared so I called her back. I talked to her for an hour and a half until I got a beep... I answer it and it's Josh's dad...
*got a sec* mr. c
sure let me get off the other line................ Ok so whats up? Me
*did you get anything about that check you wropte me bouncing* mr.c
.......... Uhhh? No...... But I think it did. me
*great I had to pay $89 to my bank because I bounced 3 checks against the check you gave me (in a mean voice) GOODBYE!!!* mr. c
So he hangs up on me, I'm sure he would have slammed the phone down if it weren't cordless! I was all like what the hell??? First off all I told him that Josh didn't deposit his check 2 weeks ago and it was going to bounce, second of all... who the hell write 3 checks against a check that hasn't cleared yet???!!!

I told Josh what happened and said *Hunny? Don't take this the wrong way but he should be mad at you, not me* He understood and said *does this mean we don't have to drive to Orlando for Thanksgiving?* AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH..... WHAT A WEEKEND!!!!!!
~M~

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

12:31 PM
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Friday, November 16

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Barbi has finaly aged!!!!!! Well I am getting ready to clean my house and do all the mom stuff I have to do. This may include my nails! Yeah, right! I'd be better off ripping em off and buying the glue it yourself kind! But those are anoying as anything!!!!! They fall off after 6 days and not all at once. First two come off and then if you glue them back on the rest come off and you don't have enough to make another set, plus you can't get the ones you just gued on off!!!!!

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

2:25 PM
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Thursday, November 15

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>In kindergarten your idea of a good friend was the person who let you have the red crayon when all that was left was the ugly black one.
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>In first grade your idea of a good friend was the person who went to the bathroom with you and held your hand as you walked through the scary halls.
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>In second grade your idea of a good friend was the person who helped you stand up to the class bully.
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>In third grade your idea of a good friend was the person who shared their lunch with you when you forgot yours on the bus.
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>In fourth grade your idea of a good friend was the person who was willing to switch square dancing partners in gym so you wouldn't have to be stuck do-si-do-ing with Nasty Nick or Smelly Susan.
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>In fifth grade your idea of a friend was the person who saved a seat on the back of the bus for you.
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>In sixth grade your idea of a friend was the person who went up to Nick or Susan, your new crush, and asked them to dance with you, so that if they said no you wouldn't have to be embarrassed.
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>In seventh grade your idea of a friend was the person who let you copy the social studies homework from the night before that you had.
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>In eighth grade your idea of a good friend was the person who helped you pack up your stuffed animals and old baseball but didn't laugh at you when you finished and broke out into tears.
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>In ninth grade your idea of a good friend was the person who would go to a party thrown by a senior so you wouldn't wind up being the only freshman there.
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>In tenth grade your idea of a good friend was the person who changed their schedule so you would have someone to sit with at lunch.
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>In eleventh grade your idea of a good friend was the person who gave you rides in their new car, convinced your parents that you shouldn't be grounded, consoled you when you broke up with Nick or Susan, and found you a date to the prom.
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>In twelfth grade your idea of a good friend was the person who helped you pick out a college/university, assured you that you would get into that college/university, helped you deal with your parents who were having a hard time adjusting to the idea of letting you go...
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>The summer after twelfth grade your idea of a good friend was the person who helped you clean up the bottles from that party, helped you sneak out of the house when you just couldn't deal with your parents, assured you that now that you and Nick or you and Susan were back together, you could make it through anything, helped you pack up for university and just silently hugg ed you as you looked through blurry eyes at 18 years of memories you were leaving behind, and finally on those last days of childhood, went out of their way to give you reassurance that you would make it in college as well as you had these past 18 years, and most importantly sent you off to college knowing you were loved.
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>Now, your idea of a good friend is still the person who gives you the better of the two choices, holds your hand when you're scared, helps you fight off those who try to take advantage of you, thinks of you at times when you are not there, reminds you of what you have forgotten, helps you put the past behind you but understands when you need to hold on to it a little longer, stays with you so that you have confidence, goes out of their way to make time for you, helps you clear up your mistakes, helps you deal with pressure from others, smiles for you when they are sad, helps you become a better person,and most importantly loves you!

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

1:51 PM
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Dudes! I may *in the future and indirectly* know a band! Brent *Annies man* is doing a recording thing! I know no one reads this thing so they shouldn't mind I said anything and if you guys do... let me know and I'll take it out. But isn't that cewl!? So I am awake at yet another ungodly hour for yet the second day in a row! But I must go feed the people. Love ya'll
~M~

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

9:48 AM
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Ok... SO Josh pulls another all-nighter lastnight *good and bad* Good because he got up with Branden and made me coffee, bad because eventually the sleep deprivation caught up with him and he slept the afternoon away. I just like spending time with him on his days off and him sleeping got to me... I did, however, go to bed at like 10pm lastnight and got up at 9:30!!! I haven't slept like that since I was pregnant! I slept all lot then... untill the baby kept me up all night playing soccer with my bladder! LOL I swear sometimes it was like a scene out of a allien horor movie! All you would see is this big round tummy and then an arm would come creepin across, then you would see his toes by my ribs *thoughs of you who know me know I am a very small person... Like annie... So he was a very promonent figure* I used to tickle his feet so he'd move them and I could breath for a minute before he put them back! He was smart even in the whomb! I poked him and he poked me back. I know it sounds mean but the doctor told me that if he got up in my ribs and I couldn't breath then I should move him GENTLY! I wouldn't do it for the longest time... Then, one night I couldn't stand it anymore and I did it and me and my unborn child had our first fight. But he's the cutest kid in the whole world. I love you all and need to go to sleep, so on that note... SWEET DREAMS TO ALL AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!!!!!!!!!
~Melissa~

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

1:26 AM
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Tuesday, November 13

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Ok so yeah

I didn't do *all* of the stuff I wanted to. I did clean the kitchen, vaccuum, buy new plug ins and carpet sprinkles, and clean the porch. SO some things I did do and some I didn't... Tomorrow will be better. I plan on going to bed VERY early tonight because there is so much I want to do tomorrow. Branden sounds like he's trying to pull an all-nighter again, but I don't think so hunny! I can not keep doing this with him. Oh well... I am a mom and I have to do what I have to do *including staying awake till6 am* But for now I must go... Love you all much.
~M~

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

9:14 PM
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you know you're bored when you feel the urge to clean your house! And you have no life when you get bored with downloading music and move onto videos and movies!

Today i plan to get my nail filled and fixed, steam clean the carpets, scrub my shower, clean out the dog crates, scrub the dogs, and start the weelky loads of laundry. Lets see... How many of these will actually happen??? 2 out of 6 ain't that bad, right?

Mom and I had sooooooo much fun lastnight! We sat infront of Puter and talk to people. Mom told me what to write and I typed... *Ihad fun* I was sucha wise ass to some of these people. Like this one guy asked if mom worked out... so we went into how she used to use free-weights and lifted 30# each arm. The he's all like *well, what did you do* So I was all like what is with this guy? So I typed *I put the tape in the vcr and did what it said* Mom hasn't laughed that hard in God knows how long! But it was fun. Then Randy called and mommy lefted:( We'll have to do it again.

Anywyas... I am once again failing my mission to get Josh out of bed. I don't see why he can't just go to bed at a normal hour and wake up in the am hours. Normally... he gets up at like 12-1 and i see him until 2 when he goes to work. Then when he gets home I am so ready for bed! I'm gonna start going to sleep at like 10, then maybe he'll start getting up earlier to see me. *Yeah, and a monkey might fly out my a$$ tonight*! Well people... I better go and get started on all my projects for the day. I'll write later and tell you how I did with getting them all accomplished.
Love Ya'll Lots and Lots!!!
~Melissa~

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~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

12:02 PM
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When Branden was an infant, he was the perfect sleeper. No 3am feedings or screems in the middle of the night. In fact the first night we brought him home he slept for 6 hours straight! When I woke up and the sun was out, I ran to the basenett to make sure he was alive! I know, it sounds morbid but it's true. I think it was mostly because we were night owls. Josh was at school till 10pm and we would spend a lot of time together when he got home. I remember Branden would have his last bottle around 1130 and then i would give him an extra 2 oz right before I went to bed. Then he wouldn't wake up until 8-9! I thought I would be awake all night *just like evryone said I would* but it was great.

I'm just scared that my next baby won't be as cooperative. But I have lost more sleep in the past week than I have since Branden had his surgery when he was 6 weeks old. He has been up all day and won't nap, then I put him down at night and he stays awake for 3 hours playing in his crib, the he sleeps for like 3 hours and wakes up again!!! I am so confused! So this is partly why at 1:21am I am awake and on the net instead of nice and comfy in my nice warm bed! I am so tired and am in so much pain... But ya know what? It's all worth it. God gave me this baby boy to take care of and raise to the best of my ablilties, and that is exactly what I am going to continue doing. I have hit some low points but I always seem to bounce back. And I always will. I love this kid with all I have, and I always will. But for now I am going to go try to get him to sleep and get myself some rest. I love you all and give youselves kisses for me and the baby.
~M~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

1:27 AM
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You know what I absolutely love? *besides singing and being a goof ball* Talk to friends that I love. I talk to Rany for like an hour if not longer. He is so much fun to talk to! He is like one of my oldest friends and my best guy friend. I feel like I can tell him anything and he always understands. He never puts me down and he's always there to help me through a rough point in life. Thanx Babe! He's the best. No offense to you guys. I know there was none taken. WHy? cuz you are all awesome!
~M~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

12:23 AM
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Monday, November 12

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Dude... mom has some nice guy friends... What the hell???!!! Why don't I?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

8:39 PM
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This is deep man... Why can't our guys write like this?!?!?!
Another friend of mom's


*I ll never settle for thinking that I ve figured life out and will always be interested in meeting new people and learning about their respective worldview(s). There is nothing more intense than experiencing a woman s world vicariously through her own eyes her heart and her thoughts! Not just romantically that s incredible enough. I just mean interpersonally i.e. actually dropping the fronts and communicating on an honest and secure level. There s nothing more flattering than being entrusted with such friendship. There s a part of me that will always be playful where appropriate and will somehow creatively enjoy the experience of living and laughing even during relatively difficult times. In contrast there s always the loyal side of me that will drop everything to support a friend relative and even a stranger when needed... *

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

8:38 PM
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*If you like romance humor versatility and understanding along with affection and kindness then we need to talk!!!
I truly believe that 90% of life is attitude and that love only succeeds when there is no hidden agendas. True love comes from loving others even more than we love ourselves and is unconditional. Forgiveness and compassion are key elements in a truly successful relationship. May God bless you in your search and may true happiness be found by you.*

Couldn't have said it better myself... Thanx Don * a guy mom talks to*

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

8:36 PM
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Ok... so I read my horoscope today and it made absolutely NO SENSE!!! So needless to say I have come to the conclusion that they aren't even real!!!!
~M~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

8:29 PM
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Smelled something funny coming from mom's car yesterday... So i took the liberty of checking her engine a few minutes ago... Low oil and Antifreeze! Hello!! Cn you say saved by my nose. That would have been big $$$$$ She once neglected to do the oil thing in her MR2... well the engine froze up, belts snapped, and she went broke and carless for a few days... But hey I hooked her up this time. :):)
~M~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

2:10 PM
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*In a whining, sobbing, annoid, frustrated, tired tone*

I am so tired! Why am I so tired? Why are my $25.00 acrylic nails coming off already?

*ok... normal voice*

life is such a challenge these days. Yesterday I was at publix and saw some flowers for $9.99... I never got flowers for anyone before... So I bought them for Josh. 1/2 dozen red roses! I was so excited! Then I stopped to think... *do gilrs buy roses for guys?* No matter the answer... I did it, and he liked them. So anyways... Why is it that when I want to go somwhere... Only mom is the one to take me? I mean come on now...! What am I suposed to do? Get into my invisible car and just drive away??!! I evy my 9 year old sister, because when she turn 16 she'll get her car *or my dad's* and go where ever she damn well pleases! I called aa nial salon and they aren't busy and they take walk ins... But Josh is all like I have to leave in an hour. The place is not even 5 minutes up the road but I am not about to walk down Bruce B Downs!!! To all you guys in Orlando It's the equivilant to 50! Well maybe 436... 50 is kinda ghetto... But, you see my point right? Anyways I must go and de-funktify myself in a nice hot shower:) Bye for now.. Love ya guys
~M~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

2:06 PM
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Sunday, November 11

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Ahhh

Singing is my outlet! I know I am good *to an extent* I used to have solos and sing a damn good first soprano, but that was many moons ago... Now I can pass as a first but I'm not that high anymore... I don't mean to sound vain but I love to sing!!! I could sing for hours on end and that bugs people but I don't care!!! ha! how do like them apples??!! Like right now I am singing Brandy & Boys II Men's, Brokenhearted, I have had it on repeat for like an hour cuz I haven't heard it in like 3 years! Anywho!!!! I am so bored... oooooooooooo I am missing my shows... Yes, I just said I have shows... I am an old woman LOL
Love For All
~M~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

8:06 PM
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Women-at-Arms


*Take all American women who are within five years of menopause - train
us for a few weeks, outfit us with automatic weapons, grenades, gas masks,
moisturizer with SPF15, Prozac, hormones, chocolate, and canned tuna -
drop us (parachuted, preferably) across the landscape of Afghanistan, and
let us do what comes naturally.

Think about it. Our anger quotient alone, even when doing standard stuff
like grocery shopping and paying bills, is formidable enough to make
even armed men in turbans tremble.

We've had our children, we would gladly suffer or die to protect them
and their future. We'd like to get away from our husbands, if they
haven't left already. And for those of us who are single, the prospect
of finding a good man with whom to share life is about as likely as
being struck by lightning. We have nothing to lose.

We've survived the water diet, the protein diet, the carbohydrate diet,
and the grapefruit diet in gyms and saunas across America and never lost
a pound. We can easily survive months in the hostile terrain of
Afghanistan with no food at all!

We've spent years tracking down our husbands or lovers in bars, hardware
stores, or sporting events...finding bin Laden in some cave will be no
problem.

Uniting all the warring tribes of Afghanistan in a new government? Oh,
please ... we've planned the seating arrangements for in-laws and
extended families at Thanksgiving dinners for years ... we understand
tribal warfare.

Between us, we've divorced enough husbands to know every trick there is
for how they hide, launder, or cover up bank accounts and money sources.

We know how to find that money and we know how to seize it ... with or
without the government's help!

Let us go and fight. The Taliban hates women. Imagine their terror as we
crawl like ants with hot-flashes over their godforsaken terrain. I'm
going to write my Congresswoman. You should, too!*

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

7:20 PM
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this is sick!!! I have a cup ontop of a stool catching the dripping water from my roof!!! I am pissed! I would expect this from an older apartmenet or from something in the hood... but nooooooooooooooo it has to happen to me in my nice apartment!!!!!

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

11:21 AM
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Saturday, November 10

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I said earlier this week that I was sick... Well I swear my tummy doesn't know what food is anymore!!! Everytime I eat I get a tummy ache:( Oh well... I should probly * inkow i spelled it wrong* lie down and rest.

OH YEAH!!!!!!!!! *big huge grin* I was talking to mommy and she was singing this old Madona song and it compelled me to download True Blue by Madona. I can remember singing and dancing around my Grandma's in NY witht hat song blasting and her yellin *I Meleesa! Baha lo musica* Melissa Turn down that music. I lost the tape but Now that I think about it it is probly in a bow on the top shelf of a closet so I would get over the song:) *laughing loudly* owwww
~M~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

8:56 PM
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I doubt she'll tread this but hey whats a girl to do

Annie,
I so know where you are right now! I was there 4 years ago. The only difference is that my parents actualy did ground me. They thought that if I was kept from the outside world that I would forget love and forget that I am meant to be with Josh and I was a happy person as long as I knew he was there with me, even if not in the flesh. I have no advice because you have turned into a great person who knows what she wants. You know what you are doing and you have your stuff together. I do have to say that your parents *disappointed or whatever they may be* have a point... If I sent Branden off to college and he came back 4 months later engaged I would be thrown for a loop, however... I would not insult him or tell him he is in the wrong for following his heart

Now, if I sent him off to high school one day and a week later I was informed I'd be a grandma... Then thats when the nails come off and the Puerto Rican New Yorker that I really am comes out. I'm sorry but 35 is wwwwwwwaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy too young to be GRANNY!!!!!! Anyways... Annie they will come around. I do have the privalige of knowing your family... In fact Katie and Kearstin are the same age! but thats not the point... your family is so much like my mom's side of the family it's not funny... I swear it's a Catholic thing... But I should go for now. I am soosoosoososososososo
sososososososososososo proud of you for being strong *even if you break down later*! I love ya girlie and take care... By the way... KEEP ME POSTED!!!

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

7:28 PM
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YOu all know the whole *Six degrees of separation* thing right? Well I was just revising that peom I sent everyone that I wrote back in October and thought... *Wouldn't it be funny if I got it back?*

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

9:40 AM
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Well this is not going as planned. :( I wanted to go to bed *again* but I can't!!! Why am I always so run down!??!! OH YEAH!!!!! I am someone's mother!!!!!!!! That's why!! But hey no complaints here... as long as I can have a nap later I'll be fine!
Melissa~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

8:50 AM
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Yeah, so I wake up *at an unbielevably crude hour* and go into the livingroom... What do I see? My whole livingroom is rearrganged!!! I am just wondering why there is no filter on my phoneline next to the computer now? Josh said he put one on but I don't see it but there is no static on the phone so... Whatever. I entered to win a *Walk On Role* on E.R.!!!! I am so excited. Mom called me and told me she entered me so I read the rules and you can enter once a day!!!!!! So you know where I'll be in a sec.

We;; i am so not awake yet! I'll write a LOT later on in the day.
~m~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

8:07 AM
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Friday, November 9

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Dude!? What happened to re-blogger?????

Anyways I was trying to say

*Wow was that a blog from Annie?!?!?! Good to hear from ya... Glad you are all cool and stuff. I hope you feel better soon and hope to see ya somewtime while you're here 'how many times have I said that?' so stay cool*

And HUH? to the other blog that I didn't understand but whatever, I wasn't meant to or else It would have been more clear.*

Bye for now

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

11:13 PM
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DOn't think I am wierd or something But I am so happy! *Why*? you ask... well because my friend who had to go home from school is being a goof ball, and that's more like her. So yeah, I am suposed to be writing about stuff that is *for me* but I am! It effects me when My friends aren't happy and when they are sick. When stuff like that happens to them it makes me feel what they are feeling. If Annie *forexample* is depressed and she writes a blog that makes me cry *which she has done* Then her depression has effected me. See what I am gettin at?!??! Oh well... you don't have to because this is about me. ANd only me. Well not really but I must make Chief think I am writing for me,..... Right Chief? Anywho... I must watch tv now... I love you all sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much. and I hope you are all safe and feelin good.
~M~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

8:10 PM
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Thursday, November 8

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Ok... If that didn't make and sence to you I am sorry but that is who I am I get all confused *desufnoc* (as Eddie would say) But anyways... I love you all and will eventually get around to what I am trying to say.
~M~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

1:19 AM
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*What You Love To Do*

Oh No!!!

Re-blogger is down again:( What happened?!?! Anyways... I was told by someone I don't even know that I should wite for *me*... SO that's what I should do. This isn't a place to be a goof *well yeah it is 'cuz thats me* but I should write for me...

Sometime I feel neglected... But only sometimes. I have this huge work load and not a whole lot of help... But ya know what??? It doesn't bother me as much as you would think. Tim *my friend* asked me a few weeks back if being a mom this young was hard. Well, my answer was a simple *no* folloed by a lot of built up love and affection that I haven't been letting out... that I didn't even know was there!!!

I love being Branden's mom! And I love being at home when he does the sweetest and cutest things in the world. If I did what everyone wanted... I would be missing out on so much of my son's growing. I know I am a strong person inside. I know that no matter what, as long as I get at least 5 minutes to myself a day, I will be fine:) Because I am doing what I love to do... Write and take care of my family:)

People look at me and frown, they can't believe what I do, they think I am a loser and yet, at the same time think I am a wack-job for staying home with a toddler. All I have to say to them is that I feel kinda the same towards trhem. Take Annie for example... I could never leave my family and be *ALONE* at a place where I have never been before, expected to be on my own and be a grown up, yet a kid... Which is odd because that's what I do... But from a whole other perspective. I do what I do because that is who I am, Annie does what she does because that's her! College? Not now, later, and ay a much slower pace. I know what I am doing and I am going back to school. I will be attending a community college near home for 2 years and then moving on. But I am waiting for Branden to get older... like kindergarden age, that way I can go when he's gone and be with him when he's home.

I don't know if I've told you this but I dispise day cares. I saw my sister go through them and I would never do that to my child. If anyone reads this I want to thank you and say I am blessed to have friends like you and that I hope you are all doing what you love to do.:):) Keep your heads up and keep smilin... *It looks good on ya*!!!

~Melissa~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

1:17 AM
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Wednesday, November 7

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ANNIE I HOPE YOU FEEL BETTER!!!!!!!!!!

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

4:31 PM
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Today I plan to make a pie... No, Martha Stewart is not my idol!!! Nor does she have any influence on me. Well lastnight I toolk some NyQuil and went to sleep real fast. I almost didn't make it to the bed, I got out of the shower *in my robe, ans a towel round my head* and fell asleep. The Codu dumb-a$$ fell off the bed and landed on Jazmin... Need;ess to say that woke me up and I got dressed an said goodnight to Josh. That was the last of me until 11am. I feel a little better tooday... in fact Josh and I are going on a date tonight. Dinner and a movie... ALL BY OURSELVES!!! This is cool. Well I am going to go for now... I'll let ya'll know how it goes.
~M~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

4:30 PM
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Tuesday, November 6

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My grandma loves me:)

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

5:47 PM
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does anyone even read this thing

no one ever makes a comment or writes me or what ever so

Does anyone read this thing??????

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

5:46 PM
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Oh My God!!!!!!!

i am so sick! I have the stuffy head... well ... evrything on the front of the NyQuil bottle! Ans my face hurts from my sinuses. I wish I could judt rest and not worry about having to clean and take care of every one and their cusin... But thats what happenes when you have premarital sex!
~M~
ps
don't get me wrong I love my family with ALL I have to give, and I couldn't have asked for a better one. I love my friends the same because they ARE my fanily::))

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

5:45 PM
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OH NO EVERY BODY!!!!!!!

I am sick! :( I have a really bad head cold or something like that. I'm all stuffy and I sound funny when I talk. Oh well I must rest

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

12:36 PM
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Monday, November 5

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I am so happy!!! Mommy came over and made me dinner! She made me chicken florentine! It was yummy. It was my fave. when I was little, so when she asked what was for dinner ... thats what i siad. Anyways... I went to pay the phone bill and got into it with the guy that waited on me. He was trying to tell me that the verizon $0.10 a minute was cheaper than me not having long distance at all and using 1010811! I was all like *oh no you did not just try me like a telemarketer!? I said *look over my bill and you'll see that all my long distance is never less than an hour at a time. Now, do the math and you'll see that there is no service charge and I have a flat rate 24/7!* He was all like.... uahhhh well ma-am you're right

Duh! I mean hello! i HAVE BEEN MONITARILY CHALLENGED FOR 2 YEARS i KNOW HOW TO SAVE MONEY!
SHEESH
~m~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

9:15 PM
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If any of you ever do the tan in a bottle stuff... Don't wear a watch when you clean!!!!!!!

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

4:10 PM
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Ya know what happens when you forget to pay you phone bill? *not a joke*

It get shut off and the only access to the outside world is the ever so caring DSL!!! So needless to say I must go to the verizon place and pay my phone today... while im at it maybe I'll run up to TECO and pay the power too. I should pay the cable but i don't know where it is. And I lost my check book! I am pretty talented!
~M~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

12:23 PM
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Sunday, November 4

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Well I woke up really late with one of the worst headaches!!!! I took some meds but not luck yet. Branden decided he was going to wake up at 3:30am for no reason. I did the mom thing and held him and sang to him and then put him bed with me... but he NEVER fell asleep!!!! So I put him back in his crib... Josh comes up to me and says I look like crap! I was all like *gee thanx hunnie* he gave me a big hug and walked me back into the room. We all finaly went to sleep.

I asked Josh if he saw anything different about me lastnight... And he was all like *your legs are tan*? Then I showed him the rest of the sunless tanning experience. I asked him if it looked orange and he said it looked like I was wearing panty-hoes! So I don't know if that good but whatever. If my headache goes away I want to take Branden to see Monsters Inc. He'll love that........

AAHHHHHHHH!!!! Nice hot coffee!!
~M~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

11:41 AM
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Saturday, November 3

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I got this Sunless Tanning stuff at Publix today... *incase you have forgotten... I am the only Albino-Puerto Rican that has ever walked the earth* I look like CASPER! So anyways... I did what it said and I don't know if it's because color is a new thing for my body or if I really am ORANGE!!!!!!! I think I am just tanned but I have to ask mom and Josh before I go nuts and lock myself in the room until it wears off.

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

8:33 PM
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Hey guys..... I really liked this song because it is so me! It reminds me of certain people in my life and I really would like to say hello and be free again. I wish I could find a way to put it on my blog so you could hear it if you haven't. You are missin out if you haven't heard it yet. Go download it.
~M~

CREED

"My Sacrifice"

Hello my friend, we meet again
It's been awhile, where should we begin?
Feels like forever
Within my heart a memory
A perfect love that you gave to me
Oh, I remember

When you are with me I'm free
I'm careless, I believe
Above all the others we'll fly
This brings tears to my eyes
My Sacrifice

We've seen our share of ups and downs
Oh how quickly life can turn around
In an instant
It feels so good to realize
What's in yourself and within your mind
Let's find peace there

When you are with me I'm free
I'm careless, I believe
Above all the others we'll fly
This brings tears to my eyes
My Sacrifice

I just want to say hello again
I just want to say hello again

When you are with me I'm free
I'm careless, I believe
Above all the others we'll fly
This brings tears to my eyes
Cause when you are with me I am free
I'm careless, I believe
Above all the others we'll fly
This brings tears to my eyes
My Sacrifice, My Sacrifice

I just want to say hello again
I just want to say hello again

My Sacrifice.

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

8:15 PM
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Friday, November 2

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So here I am... Sittin here sippin a rather tasty glass of wine *it's good for ya every now and then* and I am in THE WORST PAIN!!!!!!! Maybe the wine will put me to sleep. I am such a light weight! One glass of wine and I get gigglie and then tired.

So anyways... Don't get me wrong I don't *drink* I just have a glass of wine every now and then. So I get my DSL all hooked up and stuff and I have already run out of stuff to do. Mom is going to dinner with this guy she dated a while back. So far he is the only one I liked. I still call him and talk to him online. *mostly for help with Puter* but hey who's counting? I wanna move back up north:( I really miss it up there. The cold, the trees, the falling leaves... You get the picture.

Well... I love ya all and miss you guys so much.
~M~
~B~
~W~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

7:42 PM
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Ahhhhh *reliefe*

I got my DSL!!! And it is all hooked up and working and stuff. I am down;oading songs in record time *2 minuyes* and I have been watching videos and stuff. Well friends... I have entered the world of modern technology *and I got my nails done*
~M~
~B~
~W~

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

10:40 AM
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Thursday, November 1

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My steam cleaner has been broken for like a month, so I finaly get around to fixing it and another belt snaps!!!! To top it off Josh will not wake up and I can't get the ethernet card. Mom isn't home and I am going insane!!!!!!!! Someo ne please help me

~ Love * Love ~
~(~@ ~M~ @~)~

2:09 PM
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